Ive never been one of those girls who has a Hollywood crush that they get all gaga for. Granted when I was a kid, I had pictures of River Phoenix on my wall, but it was almost as I felt like I had to in order to fit in when my friends came over. I had friends in middle school who owned New Kids on the Block Letterman jackets. They had to be well over $100 and for an 11 year old, that was a big deal. I’ve never worn concert tees and never really hung concert or movie posters on my wall. Maybe one here or there, but it must have been awesome for me to do so.

That’s why I’m having a REAL hard time understanding this New Moon/Twilight thing. Are these fans of the movie or the book series? I read the books. I actually read all four in about two weeks, and I will totally recommend them to anyone who wants to read them. You can even borrow my copies. However…did these crazy New Moon fans actually SEE the movie Twilight? Seriously? I did….and it was awful. I was super disappointed…just like I was with the latest Harry Potter movie, and Dreamcatcher by Steven King.

Robert Pattinson was a great Cedric Diggory in Harry Potter. But an Edward he is not. Kristen Stewart is awful as Bella, and the speed at which they tell the story is just crap. Where is all the back story? Where is all the monologue? Those of you who saw the movie and didn’t read the book, did you like the movie on its own merits? REALLY? Did you even understand the story? It was missing ALOT.

I’m reading everyones Facebook status’ all week, and its all about their New Moon countdown, their tickets being purchased (it broke Fandango records for pre-sale). Are you all really expecting a good movie? Prove me wrong. Show me that with all that money that they made on Twilight, they actually put some effort into this film, and ‘make Edward all sparkly with awful effects like in the first. Prove to me that Werewolf effect is better than the previews are making it out to be. And why does Dakota Fanning have to be a part of EVERYTHING?

Good for all you fans out there. All you people who are obsessing over this film. Do you have the posters on your wall? Have you been obsessing about Robert and Kristen’s relationship in all the gossip blogs? Hasn’t that ruined it for you? It’s too much. The obsession with them is too great and even if this movie is any good, all I can think about is the two of them. Its everywhere. There are pages and pages devoted to this stuff on the internet…you cant escape it.

I am not seeing a midnight show. I don’t even have tickets yet.

Don’t get me wrong…I WILL see the movie. After all, I read and liked the books. I almost want to be proven wrong, and enjoy it, but am going to be going into it with such a pessimistic attitude, I think I’m willing myself to hate it. I’m just going to wait for all you crazy fans to go see it first. Then we can compare stories.

With that…I leave you with the funniest New Moon parody I’ve seen yet. And it goes with my Three Wolf Moon theme…Win.

I still haven’t quite figured out my reasoning for these posts, but I find them highly amusing, and I appreciate the participation.

The latest entry is of Heather. Apparently at the State Fair of Texas, she has not only worn the Three Wolf Moon Shirt, but she has also purchased fried coke and fried butter. These booths must make their money on sheer novelty alone, because thats pretty foul, and is clogging my arteries just thinking about it.

(photo by Andy Couch)

The Office episode was just FULL of internet memes last night. From the wedding aisle dance to the Chris Brown song, to Dwight Schrute wearing the infamous Three Wolf Moon shirt…last nights episode was definitely an hour long wedding episode worth waiting for. The dance was a little too “expected” for me, but at least they acknowledged it when Michael runs up to Jim and says “Have you seen this on YouTube??”. Spoiler alert…Jim and Pam get married. 

Anyway, I was watching the episode, cracking up at how confident Dwight became when he was wearing the shirt, and feel now that its inevitable that I get one…that I NEED one. Christmas is coming folks.

I wasn’t in the mix when the Wolf Shirt Phenomon started. I didn’t really get it. An article of clothing to go viral? But then I read the Amazon.com reviews. I saw the beauty of the shirt, and I understood. It started with this review.

“This item has wolves on it which makes it intrinsically sweet and worth 5 stars by itself, but once I tried it on, that’s when the magic happened. After checking to ensure that the shirt would properly cover my girth, I walked from my trailer to Wal-mart with the shirt on and was immediately approached by women. The women knew from the wolves on my shirt that I, like a wolf, am a mysterious loner who knows how to ‘howl at the moon’ from time to time (if you catch my drift!). The women that approached me wanted to know if I would be their boyfriend and/or give them money for something they called mehth. I told them no, because they didn’t have enough teeth, and frankly a man with a wolf-shirt shouldn’t settle for the first thing that comes to him.

I arrived at Wal-mart, mounted my courtesy-scooter (walking is such a drag!) sitting side saddle so that my wolves would show. While I was browsing tube socks, I could hear aroused asthmatic breathing behind me. I turned around to see a slightly sweaty dream in sweatpants and flip-flops standing there. She told me she liked the wolves on my shirt, I told her I wanted to howl at her moon. She offered me a swig from her mountain dew, and I drove my scooter, with her shuffling along side out the door and into the rest of our lives. Thank you wolf shirt.

Pros: Fits my girthy frame, has wolves on it, attracts women
Cons: Only 3 wolves (could probably use a few more on the ‘guns’), cannot see wolves when sitting with arms crossed, wolves would have been better if they glowed in the dark.”

It became an overnight success, and now this shirt is selling quicker than the small business can make them.

I thought it would be funny to post the pictures of my friends in their wolf shirts. First up is Andy Couch. Its his birthday today, August 31. His red beard is outstanding. When Mick and I went to Austin and stayed with Andy, we decided that this was the best thank you present we could get….and now, I want one of my own.

Happy Birthday Andy…

(photo by Heather Leah Kennedy)